Good lord, a lot has happened in the last few months. The good stuff? We launched Give Me Fuel. We’re iterating on it like crazy, making continuous improvements, and the game is getting better and better. Work is a pleasure most days, and few that aren’t are just due to “usual shit” that comes along with any kind of endeavor. It’s good.
The kids are great. Man, the volume of information that J takes in about animals and nature and dinosaurs and evolution… it’s insane. Insatiable. K is talking a lot more, now – he’s able to often clearly articulate the things he wants and how he feels. Like J, being three is a difficult time for K – learning about his feelings, and rules, and how you can’t always get what you want. But he’s handling it like a champ. Such a good-natured, happy kid. Heartbreaking to see him upset or frustrated, but he works through it quickly & is learning constantly. He’s way more physical – needs to be to keep up with someone 3.5 years older than him – but I’m constantly surprised by the things he can do, and how quickly he picks up new stuff.
The day we launched our game, my dad was rear-ended by someone going pretty fast, and his back was broken. Paralyzed from the chest down. The last month has been mostly trying to deal with that – closing up his office, dealing with insurance, flying out to visit & help where I can. There’s a long way to go, and a lot of things to do before life settles even in to whatever the new normal will be. We’ve got to move my parents out to California. We’ve got to close up the office & sell the house out here. And pack up everything. And find a new place in an absolutely insane housing market. And learn about how to deal with all the new things that we’re going to have to learn to deal with.
It’s been stressful. Launching a new game is stressful by nature. Raising kids is a stressful situation, often one that leaves you at a loss for rest, or downtime. This on top of all that has really driven me to pretty close to the breaking point, and I’ve held it together mostly only because Ei-Nyung’s taken so much of the load off where she can. But it’s been difficult. I’m so tired all the time, or so overloaded with things – which seems silly because they’re all so small. Any given task isn’t hard. Any given thing on the to-do list isn’t complicated. But the problem is that they’re almost all things that I don’t know how to do & have to learn AND have a pretty significant cost if I screw it up.
It’s like being buried in sand. No piece of sand is that bad. Doesn’t mean that when you’re buried it’s not a problem.
I’m looking forward to getting back to some sort of equilibrium. Really it’s just that any one of these things need to resolve. Kids sleep more. Game gets to some sort of survivable state. Parents get settled in. Once any one of those is okay, I’ll be okay. Until then, just keep moving forward.